Monthly Archives: September 2013


I have a standard rule against writing about headlines; we have enough blogs doing just that. But this one time I am going to break my rule (I did make it after all). Normally, I shy away from stories with regards to terrorist attack; not because I am unconcerned but because I don’t handle such gruesome and senseless death very well especially when images are so visual. But I have been drawn to the news on the Kenyan Westgate Mall attack for reasons I am not very sure (Maybe it’s because I am human, just in case you didn’t know *smiles*).

Turning on the News these days is just a nightmare. It’s constantly dominated by some sort of sad story involving terrorist attacks, deaths or political unrest in one nation or the other. After a while, one even begins to accept it as the norm and defines it as News itself. These days, it is almost impossible to think of the Middle East without thinking about political unrest, death, refugees and its likes.

Such gruesome and sad realities come close to home, being in Nigeria, where over the last couple of years Muslim extremists have terrorised the northern part of the country, in the name of some religious/political statement or the other. But even being a Nigerian and living in Nigeria presently, these current happenings still feels like some far away story because, well, I don’t live in the north and have never personally experienced such nightmare first hand (Thank God for that). It is this way for me as it is for a lot of people, whose experiences of this is only what they hear and read about. I am not saying people don’t empathise, but truth be said, one cannot really understand the depth of such terror if you’ve never experienced it. Sadly, this distant reality is an everyday terror for some people who live in Syria and other places, even some places in Northern Nigeria. For some unfortunate people like those involved in the Kenya Westgate Mall attack, it is an unexpected reality, they only thought they could read and hear about, nevertheless, a reality that struck and they will live it for the rest of their lives (Assuming they were lucky enough to survive the attack).

Considering how dominant these sad realities have become, it is no wonder they hardly come as a shock anymore. Hearing about Boko Haram attack in Northern Nigeria is less of a shock than it was when it all began. Hearing about riots and unrest in Egypt has become a passing story for most of us, even less, attacks and suicide bombers in the Middle East. And honestly, this, in my opinion, is what makes it sadder. It is so sad and heart-breaking that such gruesome attacks and senseless deaths have become part of the world’s reality so much so that, no matter how much BBC, CNN or any other television network repeats the story or get different analysts to analyse it from different angles, it has become normal to the average individual who isn’t directly involved in it. We may stay glued to the television, we may empathize with those involved but the reality is, it is someone else’s reality and we move on with our own lives, our own issues and the next story.

However, this time, the last attack on Kenya Westgate Mall did hit me more personally than before. I have spent more time thinking about it, analysing it in my mind over and over again. Trying to see if I can understand the terror those involved experienced (even though I know I can’t) or what could ever make a human being lay siege on another fellow human being in much a frightful and despicable manner? Maybe my longer focus on this attack is because it went on over a couple of days, maybe it’s because the visual images of those involved included pictures of children with such unguided terror in their faces (Children who were probably having ice cream and enjoying the afternoon before the terror struck and maybe saw their parent or family member die in front of them), maybe it is because this time the fallen individuals became so personal, knowing that one of them was a woman who was 7 months pregnant. It seems so personal, so needless, and so heart-breaking that all I can really ask is WHERE IS ALL THE LOVE IN THE WORLD???

Love that promotes peace instead of war

Love that promotes unity instead of division

Love that promotes lifting up instead of pulling down

Love that is adverse to hate

Love that promotes respect for life

Love is the one thing I know that can heal the world and stop these despicable happenings around the world. Maybe it is naïve to expect sure love to rule the  world but in my opinion, it is what the world needs and what it should preach because from where I am sitting, it is the only thing that can cut across boundaries, religions, cultures, race etc and save the world from such needless and gruesome realities.

I have chosen to write about this and send a prayer  for all victims everywhere, across boundaries, cultures, religions and race… before like most people, life moves me along to my own issues and challenges.

My heart goes out to everyone involved in the Kenya Westgate Mall attack, their family and friends and the survivors, I pray your physical, mental and emotional wounds be healed as quickly as possible

My heart also goes out to everyone around the world suffering from one senseless loss, attack or the other; the refugees from Syria, Victims of the Boko Haram attacks in Nigeria, ALUU 4, Nigeria,  Victims of the Sandy Hook Elementary School, America and so many others. I pray for all survivors, family and friends of the unfortunate non-survivors, that y’all all find peace and beauty in life again.



Posted by on September 26, 2013 in Uncategorized


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Since my blogging experience began, I have been looking forward to today, the 4th of September. For the past two years, today is a day I have reserved in my heart and head to remember my dad (daddy) who passed on this day, three years ago.  Not to say I don’t remember him almost every other day, because I do. But today and the 10th of April (his birthday) are those special days reserved to reflex on my years with him; laugh at the funny memories and cry a little (or much).

I remember the first time I read a post from my blog to my mother, she said to me ‘you know, you should really write about your dad’ and I said ‘of course’. In my head, I had previously decided to wait until today where my thoughts on my dad comes flooding right to the brim of my head and wanting to write about him, almost inevitably. However, the weirdest thing happened today… I forgot!!!!!

I woke up this morning and I forgot what today should mean to me. I didn’t remember until I got a text from my brother. ‘What!!!!! How on earth is this possible????’ I thought. For an hour or so after I got the text, I was so mad at myself (maybe still mad at myself). I couldn’t (can’t) imagine how on earth I could have forgotten. Let me explain, I am one of those girls, who her daddy meant the world to her and was a huge part of her life (literally); as a child, travelling a lot with him (My sisters and I), plaiting his hair and him having to cover it up when visitors came by **hahaha** (Almost forgot that one).  He was involved in practically every life decision I made. He pushed, encouraged and often intimated into accepting his opinion (‘advice’, he would call it, but trust me, it was definitely more imposing than an advice **laughs**). When he passed, I thought ‘I would give anything to have that imposing “advice” again’. To hear him laugh, talk and even shout. I thought my world was crumbling down before me and I could do nothing to stop it. I thought,’God!! There is no way I am getting over this’, but today I forgot!! How does one go from believing life is over to forgetting the day that should be so important? And all I could think about was one word, Life!!!!!

As much as I love my dad, as much as he meant the world to me, Life continues. I don’t know if saying this is appropriate (but when has saying anything true been appropriate) or just makes me a cold-hearted person (maybe it does) but I also know it’s honest. I remember my dad in little ways every now and then and when someone important comes into my life, I want them to know how important he was to me. But truth be said, Life has moved on and sometimes the reality of life means we have two options; jump off the nearest cliff (Please don’t go jumping) or move on. As sad as it may be, it seems like I have moved on too.

Although for many years, my dad was a huge part of my life; although writing this makes me remember those frustrating days just before and after he passed on, and makes my heart break all over again, so much so, I can feel it and it makes my eyes well up. I have come to realise that life means sometimes you forget and also means, you always move on.

So I guess what I’m trying to say is this:

Love hard while you can

Let the people in your life know how much they mean to you

Treasure the memories of loss ones every time you remember because truth be said, sometimes you will forget.

But in it all, when you forget, it doesn’t mean you’ve stopped to love or the person meant less

Because I am absolutely certain my dad didn’t; never, not to me.





Posted by on September 4, 2013 in Uncategorized


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