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Tag Archives: loss

Experience Does Not Always Make You The Authority

“Imagine a wall that’s green on one side and red on the other. You stand on one side and only see green. I stand on the other side and only see red. We’ll both be right about the color we see, even though we disagree on what color the wall is. Being able to realize that the other person has a valid point, even if you disagree with it, that’s maturity.”

 Oliver Gaspirtz

Losing a loved one to the cold hands of death gives you a perspective on loss that only experience can explain effectively. However, it is easy to think that this experience makes us the authority on the topic of loss, but I have come to understand that this is not accurate. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on May 4, 2016 in Uncategorized

 

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2010 – Etched in my memory

“There are memories that time does not erase… Forever does not make loss forgettable, only bearable.”

You know how sometimes, you just have a crappy day with one annoying event happening after another, so much so, that, you just want the day to be over (as if, somehow, a fresh luck comes with dawn). 2010 was that crappy day for me, only, my crappy day lasted a year long.

In fairness to the year, 2010, I had some beautiful things happen as well. It was the year, I graduated with my Masters degree (with distinction I may add. What can I say, I have my smart cookie moments). It was also the year my first nephew was born (He was one cute baby with plenty of hair. He’s still cute but more talkative now). I am sure some other good things happened in 2010 but it is a year I remember for all the bad stuff that happened, basically, for all the good people who passed. Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on December 19, 2015 in Uncategorized

 

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A Special Day!

The birth of a child is almost always celebrated.

It is the beginning of  life for a new being.

Life filled with hope and possibilities;

Possibilities of what the child could be,

What it could achieve.

Today, I celebrate your birth! Read the rest of this entry »

 
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Posted by on April 10, 2014 in Uncategorized

 

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LIFE’S REALITY

Since my blogging experience began, I have been looking forward to today, the 4th of September. For the past two years, today is a day I have reserved in my heart and head to remember my dad (daddy) who passed on this day, three years ago.  Not to say I don’t remember him almost every other day, because I do. But today and the 10th of April (his birthday) are those special days reserved to reflex on my years with him; laugh at the funny memories and cry a little (or much).

I remember the first time I read a post from my blog to my mother, she said to me ‘you know, you should really write about your dad’ and I said ‘of course’. In my head, I had previously decided to wait until today where my thoughts on my dad comes flooding right to the brim of my head and wanting to write about him, almost inevitably. However, the weirdest thing happened today… I forgot!!!!!

I woke up this morning and I forgot what today should mean to me. I didn’t remember until I got a text from my brother. ‘What!!!!! How on earth is this possible????’ I thought. For an hour or so after I got the text, I was so mad at myself (maybe still mad at myself). I couldn’t (can’t) imagine how on earth I could have forgotten. Let me explain, I am one of those girls, who her daddy meant the world to her and was a huge part of her life (literally); as a child, travelling a lot with him (My sisters and I), plaiting his hair and him having to cover it up when visitors came by **hahaha** (Almost forgot that one).  He was involved in practically every life decision I made. He pushed, encouraged and often intimated into accepting his opinion (‘advice’, he would call it, but trust me, it was definitely more imposing than an advice **laughs**). When he passed, I thought ‘I would give anything to have that imposing “advice” again’. To hear him laugh, talk and even shout. I thought my world was crumbling down before me and I could do nothing to stop it. I thought,’God!! There is no way I am getting over this’, but today I forgot!! How does one go from believing life is over to forgetting the day that should be so important? And all I could think about was one word, Life!!!!!

As much as I love my dad, as much as he meant the world to me, Life continues. I don’t know if saying this is appropriate (but when has saying anything true been appropriate) or just makes me a cold-hearted person (maybe it does) but I also know it’s honest. I remember my dad in little ways every now and then and when someone important comes into my life, I want them to know how important he was to me. But truth be said, Life has moved on and sometimes the reality of life means we have two options; jump off the nearest cliff (Please don’t go jumping) or move on. As sad as it may be, it seems like I have moved on too.

Although for many years, my dad was a huge part of my life; although writing this makes me remember those frustrating days just before and after he passed on, and makes my heart break all over again, so much so, I can feel it and it makes my eyes well up. I have come to realise that life means sometimes you forget and also means, you always move on.

So I guess what I’m trying to say is this:

Love hard while you can

Let the people in your life know how much they mean to you

Treasure the memories of loss ones every time you remember because truth be said, sometimes you will forget.

But in it all, when you forget, it doesn’t mean you’ve stopped to love or the person meant less

Because I am absolutely certain my dad didn’t; never, not to me.

 

 

 

 
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Posted by on September 4, 2013 in Uncategorized

 

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